When I came to American University, I knew that one of the first things I would do as a new student would be to join the school’s equestrian club team.
During my college search, I made sure every school I considered had an established club team; riding in college was a difficult transition that I knew I wanted to keep close to me; Leaving my own horse at home to come to a new town for school was terrifying. I spent some of the most impactful years of my life riding horses, so they are, in a way, forged into my identity. And yes, I was called the horse girl in middle school.
The equestrian team rides once a week at a barn in Burtonsville, Maryland, really in the middle of nowhere. Lessons usually take about five hours out of our day, so we get to know our classmates especially well.
In my first semester, I had classes with two other freshmen and one sophomore. It was very relieving to talk about the trials and tribulations of college with people I may not have met before riding with them, but who are connected by a common passion. Once a week we get off campus to do something we all love; it’s an amazing escape from the hustle and bustle of the city.
With this, each group of lessons has its own funny stories about our lessons, our trainer or interactions with horses. When the team gets together, it’s a fun time to share those experiences
My first year on the equestrian team helped me find a sense of community on campus and I decided to stay and even seek out a leadership role.
During the summer between my freshman and sophomore years, my horse at home, Wilford, died. It was unexpected and despite my best efforts to stay around the horses, I came to despise riding and horses in general. I struggled to see where my grief was; did you hang out with a best friend? Or a pet? He was neither. But he was always there to lean on and I really feel like he understood me. These feelings left me wondering where to classify my grief and how I could possibly explain it to someone who had never understood the unique relationship between horse and rider. My feelings compounded my loneliness during the fall semester, isolating me with deteriorating mental health.
The equestrian team and our weekly lessons served as an outlet for me to comfort my grief. Meeting new members and seeing old teammates helped ease my grief, as I once again found a community that understood the complex relationship between horses and humans that I missed at home. I started competing more in region shows. Much of my anxiety about racing began to dissipate and slowly but surely my grief diminished to the point where I now fully enjoy the sport I grew up with again.
What club sports at AU did for me, I hope it has done the same for many others. While our sport may not be collegiate, it provides a low-stress environment in which our true love for the sport can flourish and even heal. Sports burnout is real and it’s great to know that there is a community out there that I know understands the pain and complex relationships that come with sports.
In the team I can ride different horses and match the strengths and weaknesses in my riding – I can challenge and push myself enough to feel confident. And while the club sports atmosphere offers an abundance of settings, I’m sure we can all agree that club sports attract students of all backgrounds and skill levels. Seeing what our sport means to people outside of our hometown gives us an opportunity to reflect on our journeys as athletes.
Despite the challenges, being a club athlete allowed me to find love in equestrian sports again. It was one of the best decisions I made in college. So I encourage those who are on the fence or miss the sports they played in high school to literally “join the club.”
Marie Santos is a sophomore in the School of Public Affairs and a columnist for The Eagle.
This piece was edited by Alanna Parker, Jelinda Montes and Abigail Pritchard. Copy editing by Luna Jinks, Isabelle Kravis, and Julia Patton.
